You've heard of ground hog's day? Well it's ground lessness hog day out here on the prairie. That's me out there in the wide expanses of dry brown grass, quivering nervously. Today I awoke to a deep sense of discomfort. Eek I am burrowless. No where to pop my head back into when I do or don't see my shadow.My first inclination was to look for a cause. Sort of like looking for the shadow? How much longer is wintery discomfort going to last? And then instead of going shadow hunting I decided I would just be the furry little creature without the burrow. I stood up on my hind legs and sniffed the air, in a prairie dog sort of way. What's up out here?
And what was on the wind was a sense of vulnerability, of openness to the energy of anything that might come my way. No burrow to dive into for respite, no home to retreat to, no living room, no bedroom of safety and sanctuary. Terror, fear struck my quivering little nose.
I remembered my homeless friend and sniffed the sense of what it must be like to always be available to others in this way. I could see that we weren't that different, me hugging the walls of my home, her clinging to her camper van.
And so that was the experience of the day, of wanting to hide and not being able to, of simply staying with the discomfort and not trying to rationalize, explain it, or make it better. Today is groundlessness hog day for me I will just burrow a little deeper into my practice. And there is always tomorrow.
